What Would You Buy For Your Kids?
CRITICISM OR POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT
Criticizing kids over and over again is more like injecting them with venom which will one day adversely affect their life’s psychology in terms of low self-confidence, fear of trying out new things in life and emotional distance from parents. Ask yourself these questions if you are a nagging mom, dad or a guardian:
- Why do you criticize?
- Does criticize makes you feel better?
- What is the message of criticism?
- What are the effects of criticism?
- How can the kids be told they are doing?
- How to reason kids?
- How do I keep anger at bay?
We all know that criticism is devoid of positivity and instead it ruins the psychology of the critic as well as the one being criticized to a great extent. So, be surprised to learn that the adverse of the effect on kids is just double of what an adult has. Excessive criticism and punishment in form of anger burst have often led to the formation of the vicious circle of unhealthy family interactions from generation to generations. And the drivers of this circle are the justified criticism and disapproval on part of parents and justified defiance and resentment on part of their kids. The personality of an individual is formulated very much in the early years of his life, and that is why parents are advised to handle their kids with extra care. Kids are too fragile to dominant, angered and criticism infused reactions and actions of the people they depend on.
If you as a parent hold a positive intention behind your criticism towards kids, then modify the way you communicate. Adopt the path of positive reinforcement. Heartfelt smile and words of praise and feedback work more wonders than this single elephant weight word CRITICISM. If kids are more praised and appreciated throughout the day and are reminded of their wrong doings in sober words during just one single interactive session of the day, the results are surprisingly better. Often kids fail to understand your positive intention behind your critical behave towards them. And so these kids simply jump to the conclusion that his or her parents are uselessly used to yelling at them, so it’s better to ignore them. Kids who are regularly criticized grow up to become angry and critical too.
As a parent, it’s your responsibility to correct your kids and always guide them towards the right path. But criticism should not be your mode. Kids are too sensitive to digest in the fact that parents can be angry as well as loving at the same time. If your child has done something wrong, try to behave patiently and get the solutions from them instead of imposing your decisions on them. Be sensitive to your child’s feelings because:
You are intentionally focusing on the behaviour, not criticizing or blaming your child; you are providing a way of working through the problem with your child; you are giving your child experience of correcting his or her mistakes; and most importantly, you are building trust and relationship with your child.